Saturday, March 12, 2011

Half empty or Half full?

It amazes me how one word from a difficult person can break my good mood.  I can be having the perfect day, and one small comment from a difficult person can rock it, if I choose to let it.  The difference between an adventure and an ordeal is my attitude.  Maintaining a good attitude is easier than changing an attitude.  There will always be difficult people. The key, for me, is to be aware of myself..... When I feel the rush to say something snide, or fight back, that physical feeling of boiling blood is my warning signal to say and do absolutely nothing.  I've got to keep a half-full attitude and pause when agitated. 

I'm reminded of a good story about facing difficult people...

Perception

 A woman told a story today that moved me. She had been studying for a Spanish test and the night before the test she composed a bunch of index cards and labeled everything around the house with it's corresponding Spanish word. She is a visual person, and  spent a decent amount of time on them.   She woke up the following morning, and  to her surprise, her roommate had rearranged them all to confuse her. She was angry and heartbroken that a person whom she trusted could do such a mean thing to her for her own enjoyment.
Full of tears and resentment, she looked around the house and began pulling them off one by one and putting them in their proper places. One by one..... This one goes here.... this one goes there... you get the picture. By the time she finished it was time to leave for class and take the test.

To her surprise, she passed with flying colors. When she arrived back at home, the snickering woman asked in a mocking tone, "So how did you do?".   Her reply?...... "I aced it, and couldn't have done it without you. Thank you."

I wanted to stand up and shout!  If we could all look at life that way, we would handle so many things so differently. Sometimes, the people in our lives who want to hurt us.... bless us. It is true that all things happen for a reason. If we can climb out of ourselves, if for a second, and ask ourselves "How can this help me grow?", what would we find? We go through life thinking we know just the right way things should be done. We go through life trying to control our situations. We go through life determined to control others.

If we let go, find acceptance, and look for the "rainbows" we will be amazed at what lies ahead. In AA we say that "God does for us what we cannot do for ourselves". I like to think that sometimes God does for us what we won't do for ourselves. The key is to find acceptance in all things. God works for Good. Only Good. In times of trouble and panic, there is a light if we slow down and look for it.

What is Acceptance? It is coming to terms with the way things are playing out, and allowing things to be what they are and People to be who they are....without us.... Without our control.

What is Resentment? It is being angry at what doesn't go the way we thought it should. Or being angry at people who have hurt us and behave in a way we think they shouldn't. How do we move past it?

Try changing the perspective. You just might find the answer that's easier to live with.

Just a thought.

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